That's So Gay

Gay-as-shit pop punk / queercore from the guys who invented this sort of thing. Campy, cheeky, cheerily explicit, pissed at times but always more on the “fun” side of the angry-to-ridiculous punk spectrum. Their first record in six years manages to call out Ted Haggard & Larry Craig (6) and feature Jello Biafra (2). Sounds like: Green Day, the Mr T Experience (whose bassist -- Joel Reader -- is now in the band, even if he IS straight), Good Charlotte, Bowling for Soup (yeah, ouch), the Buzzcocks minus the vocals. Most songs stick to the classic three-piece punk arrangement, and have a predictable verse/chorus structure. Once a friend burnt me a CD of 80s pop hits covered by punk bands, and that is what Pansy Division sound like. Not winning any awards for lyrical ingenuity, but hey.

There really isn’t a bad track on this album. Play anything so long as it’s clean. Helpful hint: One-sentence song summaries on page 2 of the liner.

try: 10, 2, 14, 3, 1 (7, if you deem it clean, rocks)
FCC firm: 4, 13
FCC s/h: 5 “faggot”, 7 “cock”, 12 “ass”

*1. syncopated garage guitar, high-beam lead electric, pretty simple pop punk.
*2. jello biafra sings. fast, heavy drums, dk-style lead guitar... and rhythm, too. gets anthropological on straight guys: “nascar bad boys bud light hooters”
*3. warm, bright pop. near-mainstreamy sound, if it weren’t for the sexual play-by-play lyrics. the title, if you were wondering, is imperative.
4. FCC midtempo pop, sprawly vocals in the chorus. joel reader wrote this.
5. FCC s/h -- angry surf guitar a la weezer’s “hash pipe”, call-and-response chorus. kinda sounds like dk. they do say “faggot” -- not for the afterschool slot?
6. slower & swingy, low-pitch vocals, lots of hi-hat and up-bend guitar. about repressed straight guys.
7. FCC s/h -- okay, they do sing “cock” every other line, but it’s still somehow funny every time. punky, silly, fast.
8. midtempo, rocky, melodic, alternates between sustained & cut-chord guitar. i like it, but the melody line’s awful similar to the one in whatsername (green day).
9. minor key, stripped-down instrumentation to start, echo-back chords, somber chorus w/backing harmonies.
*10. handclaps! bouncy pop, mostly drums and busy/boppy bass, jangly keys with on-the-measure guitar chords. awesome singalong chorus.
11. slower, double-note echo-back guitar and smoother vocals. harmonized chorus. about dating a professional whore.
12. FCC s/h -- the refrain is the title. kinda rockabilly, fast, chorus callbacks. about... playing high school football, obviously.
13. FCC heavier guitar sound, hard-hit drums. same guitar riff under both verse & chorus. on the angry side.
*14. as close to a love ballad as these guys are going to get. pretty mournful electric, deep drums, melodic chorus. early death on this one, fade out around :37 to end or be prepared for some amp activity.